Real Quick before I start... Whaddya think of my new logo?

(UPDATES ON NEWSLETTER COMING, JOIN HERE IF YOU WANT TO READ SOME OF GILS FICTION AND GET A SERIES OF CRITIQUES ON SPECULATIVE FICTION AND CLASSIC LITERATURE) Twill be a moment before fully assembled, so expect a month or two before any of those promises materialize.

Oy. Gil is busy and tired. Who knew that sheep actually could put you to sleep?

Ours don't make great pillows though. They have hair, not wool... and what wool I have had experience with... is not nearly as soft as Shaun the Sheep made me think it was.

Anyhow. Inconsistency is probably not the biggest concern for folks on here, but the Lord of Mozzarella is very embarrassed and doth wish to apologize.

Now. What hooliganism have we been up to since Wednesday of last week you may ask?

EVERYTHING. Ive spent a lot of time at the creek. Ive spent a lot of time in introspection, trying to find a solid balance of all the things I am trying to accomplish in my life at this moment and failing to some degree... I don't know what to do with all of the things I am attempting to keep up with right now.

What really is love? Is it actual affection? Or the constant companionship? I write about this in my novels but at times it feels like its all slipping away. Driving me into a dark corner of inconsistency and inability. Torn between weakness and strength.

Its tiring to be a teenager. A force on either side of you, tearing you in two. Childhood and adulthood. Which way do I go, and how do I embrace one without deforming the other? And the more and more I see it in my life, the less and less I understand of what I need to do. Life is literally a day to day thing right now. Survive and try to keep up. The best days are when I can go deep and have the peace and flexibility to get things done comfortably... but that's just not an option most days.

Im tired of surviving and I want to actually live. I want to be alive and to experience and risk and wading out of the stagnance of my current life. The everyday struggle that leads to nothing more than getting myself set for the day. The next day will require the same attention and the same exact actions repeated for little gain. And I keep pushing and pushing, hoping that someday, Ill get ahead of the game and have time to really devote to growth, to something that will take me the next step forwards.

But that time does not wish to come. And Im having to learn two things...

True Gold does not fear the fire. It is refined by it.

And sometimes, the only way forwards is to stop and be still. Take a nap, settle in for a book. Go revisit life before it got hectic. Wade down the creek. Forget the toil and take a moment to recuperate before I go back on the warpath.

To be still. And know, that he is good. There's the second half of that last one. As I strive to help others, to do more for others so they can have a taste of the attention I crave, to have someone who cares just because. Not burdened by expectations, just to care. (slight tangent), but... Im losing touch with my own self in the process, feeling more and more segregated and left behind.

What Im realizing is I need to take more time to know that he is God and that he is good during that time... I almost wonder if my passion for others isnt overwhelming my passion for God. And... Thats hard. I need to get more in touch, cause I can't shine a light I cant see.

Yep.

All that.

This was something of a self revelation. But I want to encourage y'all to step back and appreciate how far you've come, to invest in your life in a meaningful way and take a moment to reframe your view of the rat race.

ANYHOW

THE IRISH TWINS HAVE A COLLECTIVE REVIEW OF 4.5 STARS FOR CALCULATED. THATS THE AVERAGE BETWEEN OUR TWO SELVES AND HERE IS MY REVIEW FOR YOUR EDIFICATION.

Yes. Calculated was part of the process for me discovering this self revelation/introspection of the rest of this article...

Calculated by Nova McBee Review

5 stars

This book makes a lot of its points for the theme.

Nova kinda pitched this to us in person, during the Teen Track at Realm Makers and... I was getting more and more interested as Comp titles and promises started rolling out about what I could expect.

All that to say, I got what I came for.

The story was exciting and compelling, great use of dual timelines, great with the conveyance of plot twists and surprisingly original to almost anything else I have read.

It was less action packed than I expected but I don't carry beef for that. I am more than willing to sacrifice action for thematic complexity.

I cried twice. Very briefly and the first time was mixed with a laugh worthy of the Shakespearean tragedies... But yeah.

Let me drop the quotes rq... goes to grab book

Love was made to last. So why was I alone?

The more you give, the more you recieve...

True Gold does not fear the fire.

Wow. In every sense of the word wow. That carried a lot of power, and it didnt solve my problems, simply gave me a better vantage point of them.

As a writer, I hope and strive to use my gifts to bless others, and its so lonely sometimes. There are very few friends who I can always count on to be there, or to understand, or in the case of some, to listen and understand and sympathize and encourage. Its a lonely road. Its an exhausting road. Im stretching myself thin. I don't know exactly what I need to learn to fix it... But I know that I must keep forwards, and focus on those in my path more closely than before. Find the hungry and feed them, and not give my resources to those who think they are rich and will mock my offers.

Anyway. Thats interesting.

Trafficking. This was dealt with extremely well. EXTREMELY WELL. It was honest. But it was not gratuitous. It didnt need sharp gritty and explicit scenes to communicate how evil and drastically disgusting all of this was.

It kept a sharp sense of empathy behind Jo, which made her such a good character. Empathetic, Guarded, Hurt, Betrayed, Strong, Resilient, Intelligent and Reasonable.

Like her glance at Madam once she understood what Madam had endured as a child. There was no excuse for what she did, there was no need to undermine the work she had done, but she very evenly communicated that no one, no matter how evil, should have had to experience what she did.

I dunno. It made me very thoughtful.

Im interested to read the rest and I can't expect as much as book one brought through, I hear book two leans into Jo and Kai as a couple, which will have me grinning constantly, I think. So, that will keep it up to level with the review

Yeah. It was a good book. Not in my top ten. But this is one I would reread.

Have a lovely day folks!

Gil Kissling Writer, Hillbilly and Hopeless Romantic on a journey to write Historical Speculative Fiction that touches on the meaningful questions about life(or what he thinks are). His First book, "Suppression: Chronicle of the Domini" is not yet completed. Pester him on Substack here. He will rant and make excuses unless you yell loud enough. XD Click ​HERE​ to read more about Gil!

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